Love does not boast
The Bible tells us not to boast or brag. It says we need to do our best, give our best and do it without calling attention to ourselves. What is really happening when we are boasting? What are we saying when we are calling attention to our accomplishments, shining light on deeds? Aren’t we really saying, ‘don’t see them, see me? See how great I am. See what I did. Hear what others said about my skills. See me.’
Why do we do it? Isn’t this something we expect our kids to do when they’re say, 4 or 5? But too often we see it in adults. Maybe it’s that little child within us that hasn’t been validated, recognized, or encouraged and we’re looking for it now as adults.
What we have done is taken our focus off of God. How can you tell? You are thinking about yourself and not your spouse, your kids, or your friends.
We are to keep our hearts on pleasing Jesus. He is the only one who can fulfill our emptiness, and keep us on the straight and narrow path to our greatest life. When we get into relationships, we go into them thinking that person is going to save us, know our every need, take care of us, fulfill us and be our everything. No one can do that. Not one. Yet, no matter what generation we are living in, this dynamic repeats itself over the ages; we all yearn to be loved. We need attention. We want to be validated for who we are, for just being ourselves.
As time goes on, we do something in hopes to be recognized. When we don’t get the reaction we desire, we, like little children, act out. We turn up the volume by bragging, or calling attention to ourselves, which is most often unbecoming. This is not love.
What does this do to your relationships? If love is the glue in all successful relationships, what happens when we’re not acting from love?
God was not the center of my life at; I was. Instead of God-focused, I was me-focused. I was empty. I was insecure. And I expected my husband to fulfill all those empty holes in me. But that wasn’t his job. I didn’t understand that at the time. Hindsight is 20/20. Or should I say, Jesus gives us 20/20.
Jesus wants us to keep our eyes on him and let him fulfill our needs. Turn to him with our desires and insecurities and he will fill that void. Then we don’t fall into the sin of boasting. We become free to love without baggage or attachments. If we don’t, then we end up loving conditionally and that’s why we fail.
Jesus loves us unconditionally and shows us that kind of love we’re yearning for. He celebrates us. He will raise us up and we don’t have to strut our stuff to get his attention. He sees us and he is happy and pleased with everything we do, because when we keep our eyes on him, our focus is in the right place and he meets our needs. When that happens, we have no need to boast or brag about our accomplishments. We have no problem giving someone else the light they need or deserve because we are fulfilled in our own knowing we are pleasing to the Father.
When we take the high expectation off of our loved ones, they are released from the pressure of feeling they are responsible to fulfill your needs. Then they can see the wonderful person you are, instead of the needy person who makes them want to run.
When you become a person who gives without calling attention or compliments to yourself, you leave room for others to brag on you. They want to. You give them a chance to see you and appreciate the God in you. You will stand out. You will be seen. You will be raised up by your heavenly father who sees what great things you do in secret. All the work, prayer, sacrifice you have done in secret, he will reward yououtwardly. You never have to worry if what you do matters, because it does.
Read Matthew 6:1, 3, 4
"Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them..."
"...do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. so your giving may be in secret. And your heavenly Father who sees in secret will reward you."